By the time the wind has blown the weather vane around
I'll show you if I can
No matter what the circumstance for one thing I'm renowned
My character is spit spot spic and span
I'm practically perfect in every way
Practically Perfect
So people say
Each virtue virtually knows no bound
Each trait is great and patently sound
I'm practically perfect from head to toe
If I had a fault it would never dare to show
I'm so practically perfect in every way
Both prim and proper and never to stern
Well educated yet willing to learn
I'm clean and honest my manner refined
And I wear shoes of the sensible kind
I suffer no nonsense and whilst I remain
There's nothing else I feel I need explain
I'm practically perfect in every way
Practically perfect that's my forte
Uncanny nannies are hard to find
Unique yet meek unspeakably kind
I'm practically perfect not slightly soiled
Running like an engine, thats just been freshly oiled
I'm so practically perfect in every way
Well those are my credentals
Perhaps you have a few questions
Not Tempremental
Never
Not Grouchy or Gruff
Oh, the very thought
Will you stay tender when the going gets tough
Quite the contrary
Do you read stories without a big fuss
Umm Hmm
Or have objections to playing with us
Oh, I like games, but I choose them
Some minor improvements may not go a miss
But at all times you must remember this
You're practically perfect in every way
I guarantee
Practically perfect we hope you'll stay
No Flies on me
Each virtue virtually knows no bound
Each trait is great
And patently sound
Patently sound
Spit spot
La da da dee
La da da daa
La da da daa
Da da da daa
Da da da da da daa
Jane, put your toys away please
Do I have to
Yes
Michael tidy your things
It's not fair
I didn't say I was fair, I said
I'm practically perfect and here's my aim
By the time I leave here you both will be the same
You'll be practically perfect
Practically perfect
You we will be practically perfect in every way