A Letter To Santa Bob Rivers

Dear Santa Claus, It has been brought to my attention by one of our operatives that you have secured for yourself, and your interests, a very lucrative position in the toy and game industry.

There's Another Santa Claus Bob Rivers

There's another Santa Claus There's another Santa Claus There's another Santa Claus there Everywhere you look you can't escape There's Santas everywhere Bells are ringing, children screaming Something

There's A Santa Who Looks A Lot Like Elvis Bob Rivers

There's a Santa who looks a lot like Elvis The King of Rock and Roll Take a look at the double chin He's weighing about 310 With golden chains and sequined belt below There's a Santa who looks a lot like

I Am Santa Claus Bob Rivers

I am Santa Claus Ho ho ho ho ho Flying Through the snow Can you hear him ho ho ho He's so full of cheer only has to work one day a year Children in their beds Visions of sugar plums fill their heads

He's So Jolly Bob Rivers

He's so jolly Santa's so jolly Christmas night he's in his sled where he belongs You're looking great, Santa Lost some weight, Santa Red cheeks glowing, ho-ho-ho'ing, you keep growing strong I feel the

The Chimney Song Bob Rivers

Well, I waited up for Santa all Christmas night But he never came and it don't seem right. That there's something in the chimney and it doesn't make a sound, But I wish you Merry Christmas.

Decorations Bob Rivers

I love the colored lights every year And the way the neighbors stop their cars and stare I strap a Santa Claus on my roof Plastic candy canes and reindeer everywhere I'm stringin' up decorations It's straining

Wreck The Malls Bob Rivers

"Wreck the malls this Christmas season Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la Blow your cash for no good reason Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la Push your charge card to the limit Fa-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la Checkbook

Chipmunks Roasting On An Open Fire Bob Rivers

Everybody knows some pepper and a garlic clove Help to make them seasoned right Tiny rats with a crisp golden coat Will really hit the spot tonight And now when Santa sees his tray (Ho ho ho ho ho

All You Need Is Elves Bob Rivers

Elves, elves, elves Elves, elves, elves Elves, elves, elves Santa doesn't shop at Toys "R" Us Doesn't have to fight the Christmas rush He's never out of stock of even the hardest toys and games It's easy

SANTA-FE Bob Dylan

SANTA-FE Santa-Fe, Dear, dear, dear, dear, dear Santa-Fe, My woman needs it ev'ryday, She promised this a-lad she'd stay, She's rollin' up a lotta bread To toss away.

Sock It To Me Santa Bob Seger

Come on jump up, ohhhh Sock it to me Santa, you know what I like Sock it to me Santa, just bring me a bike Christmas just won't be a drag, Santa's got a brand new bag Don't you dare let those children

Santa Claus Is Coming To Town (Album Version) Bob Hannon

You better watch out You better not cry You better not pout I'm telling you why Santa Claus is comin' to town Santa Claus is comin' to town Santa Claus is comin' to town yeah~ He's making a list He's

Pokemon Bob Rivers

[Pokemon mon mon mon Lots of money mon mon mon Pokemon mon mon mon Lots of Money mon mon mon mon We got to find a pokemon Before it's Christmas Eve The kids must have a Pikachu It's called I do

The Twelve Pains Of Christmas Bob Rivers

The first thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me Is finding a Christmas tree The second thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me: Angry husband: Rigging up the lights And finding a Christmas tree

Christmas Party Song Bob Rivers

"The boss's friend is gay" More beer for you and for me And stories for us to share No fear, I jumped on a desk And danced while everyone stared I didn't even know I put on a show Till next morning take

Officer Fuhrman Bob Rivers

He likes to set up colored people. He likes to frame the colored people. Officer Fuhrman driving through Brentwood At night with a glove in his bag, his evidence bag.

Free As A Turd Bob Rivers

It's a piece of crap to me Can hardly hear the words... Whatever happened to, The rights to Love me Do? We made Michael Jackson one rich mother.

Here Comes Santa Claus Bob Dylan

Here Comes Santa Claus - Bob Dylan (밥 딜런) Here comes Santa Claus Here comes Santa Claus Right down Santa Claus Lane Vixen, Blitzen And all his reindeer Pulling on the reins Bells are ringing Children

I Used To Rock And Roll All Night Bob Rivers

It covers up a buncha wrinkled skin. You bring the bread, We'll make the gravy. You keep on standin', We'll keep on singin. I used to rock and roll all night But now my hair's turning gray.

I'm A Weight Watcher Bob Rivers

I'm a Weight Watcher, I'm a Weight Watcher, Watchin' food go by. My, my, my. I'm a Weight Watcher, I'm a plate watcher. Here comes a cream pie Mmmm, mmm, mmm.

I Came Upon A Roadkill Deer Bob Rivers

I came upon a roadkill deer A sorrowful sight to behold He lay upon the highway's edge His body was stiff and cold I bet he never saw the car Careening through the snow The lights shone brightly

Bowel Moves Bob Rivers

I was a little too stuffed, had to lose a few pounds, Pants too tight, seams bustin' out. Just had a big burrito with beans and rice, Salsa on top, with some extra spice, Lots of extra spice.

Middle Age Waistline Bob Rivers

Fields I snack between meals You can see my crack above my Levis I don't need to diet To prove I'm light And I don't peel the skin off of my chicken Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah Deep fry Don't exercise And

Flu Ride Bob Rivers

a box of antihistamines too We'll bring some Kleenex with us And sing a chorus or two Let's let my red nose lead us In a sleigh ride in spite of the flu Hack it up hack it up fling it up let's go Phlegm

Buttcracker Suite Bob Rivers

You could be dancing cheek to cheek Thong! Wiggle the string: play hide and seek Buy your workmate or your boss The proctologic dental floss That really works a hair across His astronomic bum Thong!

Wrong Foot Amputated Bob Rivers

Wrong foot amputated Wrong foot amputated He got the wrong foot amputated The doctor had compassion he tried to cure my disease I was sweating on the way to the op room gave me sedatives to put me at ease

Getting Fatter All The Time Bob Rivers

I used to be size 32 and I never gave. My jeans used to fit, I looked cool. Now I'm not the same. Put on a few pounds, my shape's getting round. And lately I can't see my shoes.

Mr. Magoo Bob Rivers

pulled a quick u-turn, And hit a pickup from Montana While plowin' down a fire hydrant too Windshield wipers slappin' time As he committed several traffic crimes This man's like a one man wreckin' crew

How It Feels (To Be Old) Bob Rivers

I used to stand on MTV, But now they bring a chair for me. Let me get a tube of ointment Let's rub my achy joints, And turn my hearing aid loud, And throw Depends into the crowd.

Carol Of The Bartenders Bob Rivers

Hark all they got Tales seem to flow Gin tinkling More Chardonnay Christmas is here Drinking the cheer Ice cubes are cold More Cuervo Gold Don't be a dink Watch what you drink Don't be a dork Don't pop

Minimum Wage Bob Rivers

-Welcome to BurgerDoodle, can I have your order please? -Oh yes. I'd like a Spiffy Burger with low fat cheese and an order of seasoned curly fries but only if they're cooked in virgin peanut oil.

Read It In The Tabloids Bob Rivers

Took a peek at the dirt about Demi Moore. And it took me by surprise I must say When I found out the Pope was gay. I read it in the tabloids. Elvis Presley's doing just fine.

Foreigners Bob Rivers

Hey, we want to be Americans, But we're illegal aliens, And we really like it here, Though we don't speak the language clear. Foreigners... Stamping out our unions, (What do you mean, man?)

Manger 6 Bob Rivers

We know you have been traveling a lot this holiday season and you've probably been told there is no room at the Inn. Well, that's just not the case here at Manger 6.

Beat Up Old Jetliner Bob Rivers

Goodbye to all my friends I've known And the travel agent I trusted. I'm riding along on this beat-up old plane; Look out the window. All the rivets are rusted.

The Twisted Chipmunk Song Bob Rivers

Ready to sing your song? -I'll say we are! -Yeah! -Let's sing it now! Okay, Simon? -Okay! Okay, Theodore? -Okay! Okay, Alvin? Alvin? ALVIN! -OKAY!!!)

It's The Most Fattening Time Of The Year Bob Rivers

the mall It's the heav-heaviest season of all There'll be turkeys for basting and stuffing for tasting and giblets and gravy will flow there'll be cookies that mom baked and leftover fruit cake from a

The Angel Bob Rivers

The angel rides with hunch-backed children, poison oozing from his engine Wieldin' love as a lethal weapon, on his way to hubcap heaven Baseball cards poked in his spokes, his boots in oil he's patiently

When A Man Loves A Chicken Bob Rivers

When a man wants a chicken, spends his very last dime Buying her fresh corn down at the grain and feed.

OJ's Trial Thing Bob Rivers

You expect people to believe that there are people actually playing golf at ten o' clock at night? Ya wanna know what I think?

Jingle Hells Bells Bob Rivers

Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Like Guns N Roses with Axel Rose spittin' Ozzie's black eyes and the bats that he's bitten Big Marshall stacks and a broken E-string These are a few of my favorite things Ho Ho Ho Penthouse

Homeless On the Holidays Bob Rivers

Oh there’s food for the homeless on the holidays Cause no matter how filthy or uncombed If you’re down on your luck you can really graze For the holidays we throw those bums a bone I met a man who drank

Must Be Santa Bob Dylan

Who's got a beard that's long and white Santa's got a beard that's long and white Who comes around on a special night Santa comes around on a special night Special Night, beard that's white Must be

Who Put The Stump Bob Rivers

I'd like to find the guy Who done me wrong And stuck my butt up On this Christmas tree. Who put the stump In my rump-ba-bump-ba-bump? Who took and jammed it In my ram-a-lam-a-ding dong?

CALL LETTER BLUES Bob Dylan

CALL LETTER BLUES Well, I walked all night long Listenin' to them church bells tone Yes, I walked all night long Listenin' to them church bells tone Either someone needing mercy Or maybe something

Joy To The World Bob Rivers

The Lord has come Let earth receive her King Let every heart prepare Him room And heaven and nature sing And heaven and nature sing And heaven and heaven and nature sing Joy to the world The Lord has come

Spinning Reel Bob Rivers

(Spinning Wheel - Blood, Sweat & Tears) Rod goes up Line goes out Spinning reel Fishing for trout Casting toward the bubbles and you reel it in Hook a speckled rainbow watch the spinning reel spin You

O Come All Ye Grateful Dead-Heads Bob Rivers

"Oh come all ye Grateful Deadheads to the concert Oh come Grateful Deadheads And camp in the street Bring rolling papers Don't forget your sleeping bags Oh come get us some floor seats We followed them

Walkin' 'Round In Women's Underwear Bob Rivers

In the store, there's a teddy. With little straps, like spagetti. It holds me so tight, like handcuffs at night. Walking around in womens underwear In the office there's a guy named Melvin.